All Southern women strive to be belles
Difficulty Level: hard Time Required: 10,512,000 minutes
- Offer Mint Julep or Iced Tea to everyone who visits your house.
- Eat grits everyday for breakfast.
- Refer to your house as "The Plantation" no matter how small your house may be.
- Refer to all men as "gentlemen caller" or "beaux".
- Never let a man know you're interested or chase him because you know there are too many men who want you for you to expend the extra effort.
- When you have a dating dilemma and have one gentleman caller over when you are expecting another, claim to be "expired" and excuse yourself for a nap until he leaves.
- Whenever you are asked to do any work, fan yourself and claim to have the "vapors."
- Refer to every party you go to, even a kegger at the local university, as a "cotillion." All other parties are yankee garbage.
- Try to use words like "darlin'", "sweet" or "precious" in every sentence.
- Belong to a country club. If you don't, refer to any club you belong to as a "country club". No one will know the difference.
- Set under a magnolia tree with a parasol fanning yourself often. Passers-by will take notice of your belle-ness.
- Never marry a Yankee unless you want to be a Yankee by association.
- Never be seen without your makeup and girdle.
- A parasol and an umbrella are not the same thing. If you refer to your parasol as an "umbrelly" you will never be a belle.
- Being a belle is a lifetime of work so practice everyday.